


cuffing season

by eat_crow



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Friends With Benefits, Handcuffed Together, M/M, Sexual Content, rated m for morons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:01:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27863470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eat_crow/pseuds/eat_crow
Summary: Merlin mistakenly handcuffs both himself and Arthur to Arthur's bed frame. They can't reach the key to free themselves, and are stuck together. Might as well make the best of a bad situation.
Relationships: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 23
Kudos: 176





	cuffing season

**Author's Note:**

> this is basically crack taken seriously. i want to seriously thank [idlestories](https://archiveofourown.org/users/idlestories/pseuds/idlestories) for the fucking hilarious conversation that lead to this fic being written.

Merlin loves it like this. Nighttime rain pattering on the window,  _ you've got it bad girl  _ on his sex playlist, straddling Arthur's hips as they kiss slow and lazy on Arthur's crisp bedsheets, and nothing but time. Arthur is so delightfully open beneath him, unguarded the way he never is outside of his apartment. He rests one hand on the back of Merlin's neck to keep him close, playing with the hairs at his nape. Merlin sucks Arthur's tongue as he pulls away. He removes his hand by the wrist, turning his head to press his swollen lips to Arthur's palm.

"Hands up, baby," he says softly, and he strains against the zipper of his jeans as Arthur oh so obediently does as he's told and reaches up to grasp the metal rungs of his headboard. 

Merlin presses his hand flat against Arthur's stomach and pushes upward, between the swells of his pectoral muscles and through his golden chest hair, up to his throat where it stays. He rubs his thumb up and down his neck. He squeezes a gentle pressure and Arthur's eyebrows worry together, a rumbling moan rising from the back of his mouth. He sinks into the bed with a sigh through his nose. Merlin watches his eyelids flutter shut and the tension in his shoulders ease.

He can barely move he's so turned on.

"You're gorgeous," he whispers, almost to himself, and Arthur's lips press together as his already pink cheeks flush over in a delightful red.

"Merlin…" he starts. He shifts his hips. Merlin bears his weight down to make him still.

"I know, I know," he interrupts, a heat of his own burning his face. His hand leaves Arthur's throat as he leans over to rifle through his nightstand drawer. He tosses a bottle of lube and a condom onto the bed, and then a pair of fuzzy pink handcuffs he'd bought as a gag gift and ended up using an awful lot. The key is somewhere inside the drawer, but he doesn't know where. If worse came to worst he could find a paperclip.

Merlin locks the first cuff firmly around Arthur's wrist and loops it around the rung. He tugs on it a little harder than necessary to test, grinding his hips down in the same moment, and Arthur tips his head back and moans like he's already getting fucked. Merlin groans in response. Warm honey fills up his belly and he can't help but start to rut against him, the drag of his jeans and Arthur's slacks a maddening friction.

Arthur raises his head for a kiss and Merlin is more than happy to oblige him. It's all hot hearted desire, pressed as close as they can get, breathing in the same air. Merlin fumbles with the handcuff as he struggles to fasten it to Arthur's wrist blind. Eventually, he gets it to click into place. He goes to unbutton Arthur's pants.

His hand yanks against something metal.

Merlin pauses and tugs his hand a second time. Unmistakably, he's stopped by the handcuff. He looks up, ignoring the discontented noise Arthur makes, and sighs. He somehow managed to cuff his own hand to the headboard.

"What the hell are you doing?" Arthur asks, craning his neck to see, and then bursts into laughter. "Oh my god. Are you serious? Of all the idiotic--"

"It's your own fault," Merlin says, "moaning like a fucking--" he grunts as he tries to get to the nightstand drawer again and is barely able to reach past the mattress-- "wanton--" he bites his lip as he strains against the cuff. It's on his left hand, and the drawer is also on his left. He drops his head to Arthur's chest and lets out a miserable laugh.

"Please tell me this is a bit," Arthur says, genuine concern starting to thread into his voice. Merlin shakes his head.

"You try, it's a bad angle for me," he says, and climbs off Arthur's lap to let him turn over and reach for it that way. He does, but can't do much more than touch his fingertips to the edge of it. After several prolonged moments of trying he flops back over.

"I'm going to kill you," he says.

"How? You can't move," Merlin answers. If looks could kill, his point would be made. Merlin doesn't react past a quirked eyebrow. He tugs on the cuff again. It has a little give up until it reaches the meat of his thumb. "How tight is yours?" 

"Decently," he says. He twists his hand in an attempt to force his hand free, but only succeeds in leaving a long line in his skin. He relaxes his head against the pillows and lets his arm go lax. "Okay. Options?"

"127 Hours," Merlin offers.

"We don't have a knife," Arthur says, like that's the only issue with Merlin's proposition. "We could take the headboard off."

"No dice, it's screwed in." 

"Right. Fuck."

"We could phone someone," Merlin says. He's taken to laying on his stomach with his head propped up on his hand. 

"I don't want anyone we know to see me like this," he says. "Besides, our friends are assholes. We'll never live it down."

"Lancelot won't tell anyone. And he doesn't judge." Arthur bites the inside of his lip. He stares up at the ceiling.

"Lancelot doesn't have a key, Merlin."

"He can use the spare."

"You have the spare."

"You didn't buy another spare?"

"You're right. How silly of me to not predict that, someday, I would be trapped in my bed with the only other person who has access to my apartment, and I would need a key under my welcome mat to be saved." Merlin rolls his eyes and bumps Arthur's thigh with his knee.

"What about Elyan? He can pick locks. And he keeps secrets about everything. Remember when I asked him when he got that fig tree in his living room and he told me it was personal?"

"My ex's brother is the worst possible option. If he ever finds out about this I'm going to stab myself." He wiggles over closer to Merlin and slips his hand under Merlin's stomach, looking for something. Merlin rolls to pin his wrist. "Merlin." Merlin smiles but doesn't move. Arthur digs his fingers into Merlin's side to make him squeal and jerk away. The handcuffs come with him, and Arthur's hand slams into the wall. "Merlin!"

"Sorry," Merlin says, clearly unapologetic as he laughs. Arthur takes the lube from underneath him and pops the cap while keeping a level glare on Merlin. "Are you doing what I think you're doing?"

"Yup," Arthur says, and pours little dollops of lube around his wrist. He turns his hand in the cuff back and forth a few times to spread the lube over his skin. He starts pulling. And he keeps pulling. And he pulls a little more. His hand doesn't come loose. He strains against the cuff until his face is pinched with effort. He grunts as he relaxes.

"So…."

"Shut up," Arthur says, and lifts his hips off the bed to get his phone from his pocket. He swipes his thumb across the screen and puts in his pin code. It's Merlin's birthday, he's seen it over Arthur's shoulder plenty of times before. The bastard won't admit it, though.

Arthur scrolls through his contacts and calls Elyan. He holds his phone to his ear and stares at the ceiling as he waits for him to pick up.

"Elyan! Hey-- yeah, I know it's late. Did I wake you up? Oh, that's good." He goes quiet as Elyan starts speaking on the other end. Merlin gets bored of watching and shuffles closer to Arthur. Arthur barely pays him a glance. "Hey, listen, I was wondering if I could ask something of you. Yeah, you'd need to be here in person." Merlin starts at his shoulder and starts kissing down. He keeps his eyes upward as he waits for Arthur to start paying him a little attention. "Oh really? Spain?" He sucks in a light breath through his teeth as Merlin kisses his nipple. "That's-- that's cool. Mm-hm." Merlin circles his nipple with his tongue. Arthur's knee jerks. "No, no, don't worry about it," he says, his voice tensing when Merlin bites, "I'll see you when you come back. Say hi to Perce for me." He swallows thickly. "Ye-uh, yep. Uh-huh. Bye." He hangs up quickly, double checks to ensure the call has truly ended, then drops the phone on the bed. He threads his fingers through Merlin's hair and then yanks his head up. A little moan is punched from Merlin's chest.

"Looks like we're stuck for a little bit," Merlin breathes, dragging his teeth over his lower lip.

"You sound devastated," Arthur says. He urges him up higher to kiss his lips.

"I am," Merlin says between kisses. He sighs through his nose as Arthur's tongue slides against his own.

"Don't you want to get out?"

"Sure," he says. He trails his hand up from Arthur's shoulder, across his bicep, up his forearm, stopping at his wrist. He tugs lightly to get him to let go. He guides his hand back up to the headboard. When his hand is in reach, Merlin takes Arthur's hand within his cuffed one and laces their fingers together. Arthur squeezes Merlin's hand in his own. "But... I'd also like to get off." He grins.

"Tacky."

"You're tacky."

Arthur rolls his eyes, a smile fighting to get past his stern facade. He lifts his hips up to help Merlin pull his pants off.

Sex with one usable hand while both parties are chained to a bed is about as easy as it sounds. There's plenty of laughing, and fumbling, and changing positions is almost impossible. But that first push inside is no less wonderful, and Arthur holds his hand tight like he usually holds onto the headboard, and Merlin braces himself with his one free hand on Arthur's chest as he builds up a deep, snapping rhythm - one that has Arthur letting out beautiful little gasps and moans with every thrust.

Merlin buries his face in Arthur's neck as he comes, clingy as he always is when he reaches the height of his pleasure, and Arthur wraps his legs around his waist to pull him closer. Merlin reaches between them and strokes Arthur until he finishes, breathing hard in Merlin's ear and bucking his hips into his hand. 

The break in silence comes in the form of the discomforted hum they make when Merlin pulls out. Rest assured, tying off a condom with one hand proves to be equally difficult. They devolve into hysterical giggles when Arthur lends a hand to help.

"This is the weirdest thing I've ever done," Merlin says, tugging on the latex to tighten the knot, and Arthur snorts as he reaches over the mattress and drops the condom into the wastebasket.

"Really? This is just my tuesday." Merlin laughs into his shoulder as he reaches for their underwear, which they help each other put on.

It's a struggle to get comfortable, but they manage, Merlin tucked into Arthur's side on his stomach and Arthur on his back with his leg hooked around Merlin's.

"We still have to call someone," Merlin says, his cheek on Arthur's shoulder. Arthur combs his fingers through Merlin's hair.

"Who else do we know that can pick a lock?"

"Gwaine."

"Absolutely not." Arthur tilts his head to press a kiss to Merlin's forearm. "Why not ask Lancelot? Worst case scenario he has to break a window." Merlin chuckles as he fishes his phone from his discarded jeans. He rolls over onto his back when he finds it.

"Imagine that, Lancelot climbing into your apartment like it's mission impossible." He presses his thumb to the fingerprint sensor and opens up his phone app. His most recent, and most frequent, contact is Arthur, but just below it is Lancelot. He calls, biting the inside of his lip as he listens to a dial tone.

" _ Yeah? _ " Lancelot's voice is gruff with sleep.

"Hey bud," Merlin says, laying his friendly tone thick. "What's going on?"

" _ It's past midnight, man, _ " is the answer.

"That it is." Merlin licks his lips. Arthur's eyes have gone dark and mischievous, and he dips his head down to kiss just under his jaw. Merlin grits his teeth and blames himself. "I know it's late, but there's kind of an… emergency." Arthur moves a little further down, parts his lips, and dutifully begins to suck a mark onto his skin. Merlin tilts his head to the side to expose himself, though he'd deny it.

" _ What did you do? _ " Lancelot says, his fatigue leaching through the phone. Arthur bites him, hard, and Merlin's hand yanks on the handcuff.

"Why do you always assume it's my fault?" He asks. He fights against the lightness of his breath. 

" _ Because it usually is _ ," Lancelot answers. Arthur leans back to admire his handiwork. Satisfied, he gently blows over the now sensitive skin, and Merlin's eyelids flutter. " _ And you're calling me instead of the police. _ " He does have a point.

"It'll be easier to explain when you get here," he grits out. Arthur slips his fingers underneath Merlin's boxer briefs, teasing as he moves lower and scrapes his teeth over the one spot that unravels him every time. Merlin sinks into the pillows and lets his legs fall open.

" _ Alright. Give me five minutes. _ "

"I'm at Arthur's actually," he says, his voice lilting upward at the end as if it were a question, biting his lip painfully hard as Arthur sticks his entire hand up Merlin's pants.

" _ Oh. _ "

"Yeah."

" _ I don't have a key. _ "

"Could you just…" Merlin's voice trails off as Arthur begins the process of making a new mark. He swallows. Rocks his hips up. "Can you break in?"

" _ What do I look like? _ " He asks. Merlin croaks a confused little hum. " _ Gwaine's place is on the way to Arthur's, I'll pick him up _ ." Merlin goes to stop him, but glances down at the man attached to him by the mouth and decides against it. Serves him right, anyways. He's cheating.

"Sounds great."

" _ See you in, _ " a sigh, " _ I don't know. Thirty. _ "

"Yep." He doesn't wait for a further goodbye before he hangs up and tosses the phone to the bed. 

"You," Merlin breathes, "are a horrible person." Arthur huffs his laugh against Merlin's skin, kissing each hickey individually.

"Don't dish it out if you can't take it," he answers, light and playful.

"I wasn't jerking you off, if you'll remember," Merlin says. Arthur presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

"You're right." He tugs Merlin's underwear down. His knuckles brush over his hip bone. "Let me make it up to you."

Arthur picks up his movements in earnest, his thumb passing over the swollen head, biting his neck so hard Merlin's eyes sting and his body twitches between cringing away and pressing closer. Merlin clutches Arthur's side, his heel pressing into the bed and his head tilting back as an orgasm washes over him for the second time that night. He lays back, basking in the force of it. 

"I think I have it in my heart to forgive you," he says. His hand drifts to the front of Arthur's underwear where he's straining, thick and heavy, through the fabric. 

"I was so concerned," Arthur mocks, rolling his hips down. He curls his fingers around him through his underwear and strokes him in slow motions. Merlin hooks his finger over the waistband of his boxers, tugging it down just enough that Arthur won't come in his underwear, and continues to stroke him through the fabric. Arthur thrusts into his fist, clearly frustrated with the lack of contact. Merlin watches him with glazed eyes. "Merlin," he says, his eyebrows furrowed as he continues to grind into Merlin's palm, "come on."

"I don't think I understand," Merlin says. Arthur lowers his head, trailing kisses across Merlin's cheek, his teeth scraping against Merlin's jaw. Merlin squeezes and Arthur moans, his hips jerking.

"Don't make me--" he groans, essentially fucking Merlin's hand, his breath fanning Merlin's hair. Merlin turns his head to kiss him and catches his chin instead.

"One little promise and I'll give you anything you want," he says, and his grin rises when Arthur twitches hard in his hand.

"I promise I'll be good," he says, and kisses the shell of Merlin's ear. Merlin hums as he tugs Arthur's waistline down the rest of the way to hold him bare in hand, and Arthur's strangled gasp is a kind of music to his ears when he strokes him to completion.

"Disgusting," Merlin says, dropping his hand from Arthur in favor of prodding at the warm fluid spilled onto his stomach. He runs his finger through the mess and licks his hand clean.

"Don't do that, nasty," Arthur says, and uses Merlin's pant leg to wipe him off. Merlin pulls him down and licks his cheek in one quick move. Arthur lets out an over exaggerated gag but turns his head to kiss him.

They settle back down, Merlin half on Arthur's chest. He wipes his hand on Arthur's bedsheets before he clicks the power button on his phone. He laughs.

"We still have twenty-five minutes," he says. Arthur sighs.

"I have netflix on my phone," he offers. Merlin shrugs. Ever since he and Arthur traded tv and video games for a much dirtier and sweatier alternative, Merlin's been behind on his shows. He shifts until he can see the screen as Arthur queues up their next episode of  _ the crown _ .

  
  


They're almost too comfortable when they hear Arthur's front doorknob jiggle and turn. They go to shift apart, to hide and cover, and are stopped by the handcuffs.

"Merlin?" Lancelot calls. The front door shuts.

"In here," Merlin calls back. His shoulder turns uncomfortably as he tries to face the bedroom door. The embarrassment is already setting in for Arthur, and his hands are restless and his face is flushed.

Lancelot walks in in his Easter pajama pants, even though it is December. His eyebrows shoot up to his hairline the moment he finds his two friends chained together in bed. Then Gwaine, in a rumpled button up left open in the chest and glitter lingering on his cheekbones, bumps into Lancelot's back, spots Arthur and Merlin over his shoulder, and bursts into roaring laughter.

"What the fuck is he doing here!?" Arthur asks, sitting up abruptly and yanking on the handcuff around his wrist. Merlin yelps as his hand hits the metal rungs.

"I needed to get in!" Lancelot defends. "How was I supposed to know you were going to be…" he trails off into something unintelligible and gestures to them, and Gwaine jumps and claps his hands like he's opening presents on christmas morning. Merlin covers his eyes with his hand. 

"Get us out, please," he says. "The key's in the drawer."

"It's two feet from you," he says as he comes closer. 

"Do I look like I have two foot long arms?" Merlin asks. Lancelot mumbles something unkind under his breath. He pulls out the drawer and looks through the mess within. His eyes rather than his mouth plead with Merlin that what he's touching is clean.

"So," Gwaine says, "how long have you two been a thing?"

"There's no thing," Merlin says, at the same time Arthur says, "Screw off." Gwaine nods and pulls his phone from his pocket. He swipes his thumb over the screen and points his camera. There are several shudder sounds.

"If you send that to anyone, I swear to god, I will rip--" 

"Relax, hot stuff, I'm just collecting some good old fashioned blackmail. Smile for the camera." Arthur does not. The shutter sounds again. Lancelot finds the key at the back of the drawer, and Arthur looks at him imploringly. Lancelot glances behind once, visibly considers his options in his mind, and unlocks Arthur's handcuff first.

Like a flash of lightning, Arthur launches himself from the bed and takes off after Gwaine who bolts out of the room. Arthur grabs the doorframe as he swings out into the hallway. There are heavy footsteps, a scream, a hard thud, and a slap that's loud enough for both Merlin and Lancelot to wince.

"You sure know how to pick 'em," Lancelot says, and tosses Merlin the key. Merlin, freed from the bedframe if not from the handcuff, rolls his shoulder and fiddles with the lock.

"I didn't pick anyone. We're just having fun."

Lancelot hums. Merlin shuffles off the bed and steals a pair of sweats from Arthur's dresser. He tightens the waist so they fit and ties a little bow with the string. He grabs an extra pair for Arthur.

"I'll tell you everything later," he promises.

"Feel free to leave some things out," Lancelot says, and Merlin snorts.

From the living room, Arthur yells, " _ Delete it! _ "

" _ This is suppression of the media! I have rights! _ "

" _ I'm going to suppress your fucking breathing if you don't shut up! _ "

There's another scream, and Merlin and Lancelot exchange a look before they both run out to intervene.

**Author's Note:**

> catch me on tumblr @ [sterlingdylan](https://sterlingdylan.tumblr.com/)


End file.
